The anticipated excitement in the months of waiting is now being replaced by the reality that we are back in good old Penang. The hot and humid weather almost melt us every time we go out and hit reality into us that "hey, we are in tropical Penang". No more erratic temperature change of Melbourne. Did we enjoy the trip? If you asked my kids, it will be a resounding YES! As for Ed and I - it was indeed a very tiring one running after an active toddler who is ready to explore just about anything and anywhere.

There was no time to slowly ease into routine. We were welcomed by a lot of work awaiting to be done especially with the Christmas season. Today - in my quiet moments...with kids all gone for Christmas shopping, I finally get to pen down as I traced God's doing in every single move in our trip to Melbourne. Another faith trip. Another miraculous act. His prompt provision is beyond description. Only God can do all these. Indeed He is "I AM WHO I AM".

We were surrounded by love through his people. Love. God's love. Can you understand it all?

There's a quiet celebration of his love in my heart as I think of Christmas.
Surely Christmas isn't Christmas till it happens in our heart.

Blessed Christmas and Have an Enriching 2010!

Ashton protested to be fastened. He wriggled hard to be freed from my attempt to fasten his belt as the plane was preparing for landing. I whispered a prayer to the Father asking for help to keep the toddler down. The moment I succeeded, I sighed a relief and prayed that he would keep still till we landed.

As the plane landed at the Melbourne Airport, I whispered a "thank you" to the Father again and asked that He will show me more...apart from attending Peggen's wedding, an important affair to us. We have every reason to be thankful for this young woman whom we have watched from being a teen full of dreams in a local college to being a mature woman of faith...and preparing to be a beautiful bride. Deep down in my heart I know the Father always has a multi-purpose plan. He always maximize the opportunities. So I have to be in sync with him to ride on every opportunity, and learn well. "God, what are you teaching me this trip?"

Suddenly it dawned upon me, I was shedding the old of my spiritual autumn and resting in my spiritual winter the last trip I was in Australia. The exact seasons in the physical during our sabbath then. Here in this land again after 2 1/2 years, we were welcomed by the cool refreshing spring and preparing to enter into summer in just a little while. In the spiritual, that's our season too - a season of ploughing and hard work of planting. Yet in a little while we will see the fruit. Then again, we have to be diligent in protecting the fruit from the heat of summer. Spiritual warfare! Nevertheless, summer is a season of lots of work and sweat yet it is coupled with fun in the sun. Certainly we are in the challenging season but also anticipating tremendous excitement.

Inevitable change! I need to know my season to maximize every opportunity given before I welcome the next season.

Life is always changing. Seasons change. People change.

October 8 is always doubly special. My mum and my father-in-law share the same birth date. As we rejoiced and celebrated this day, it also reminded me with every birthday we grow older. It thrill our hearts to see the children grow. On the other hand, I am thankful for our parents but as I traced their obvious aging signs, my heart aches to face the reality that they are no longer as strong and energetic as they used to be. Their faces bear increasing lines and sagging muscles. Their gait is no longer as steady. Their pace slower. They need to rest in between during outings. Their lives draw closer to the eternal home each moment. It is a fact I have to face and I am so grateful for our parents to know they love me so much and raised us all to live a full life.

I thought of my children's plea every now and then, "Mum, please don't grow old. Please stay young and beautiful (beauty is in the eye of the beholder and ahem, this could be a biase statement from adoring children :) And I will always reply to each of them, "I wish I could, honey but we all grow old." Then I will ask them, "Will you love me just the same?"

Now I stand in my children's shoes and wished our parents won't grow old...but it is a fact I have to face. Change is inevitable. As I looked intently at each of them, I can only say, "I love you just the same."

Old is gold :) May God's grace and countenance be upon them as they age.

Merdeka Day is here again.
The noise of celebration begins...
Jalur Gemilang berkibar...

As a nation we have our ups and downs.
The political scene never interest me but can I ignore totally and be indifferent, I sometimes ponder...
I was born and bred in this beautiful rich land. At a glance, it's easy to overlook the true beauty of this nation especially for people who have lived here too long and taken for granted the blessings upon this land. As I mature through the years, my eyes are open to the splendour of Malaysia - a land of great potentials.

How many talk about change? Yet refuses to be a part of it. While the migration rate is increasing, my eyes look further in and deeper to this nation.
I see opportunities.
I see a generation rising up to rebuild the country.
I see great things coming...

I bless Malaysia, tanahair ku!
Biarlah Cahaya menyinari Mu, sekarang and selamanya.

Nathalynn - the Beautiful Gift of God


Chrisa almost came premature too at 34 weeks... but she's always full of surprises. When all of us expected her arrival (even the doctor), she decided to wait a lil' longer...so she came right on time at exactly 36 weeks making her a term baby....though still 4 more weeks to the full gestation. Right from the beginning, she's always delighting us with her smiles and wittiness...life is never dull with Chrisa. She never fails to invite you into her creative world. Last year was all geared up being a soldier. This year, she's the ninja on a secret mission :) Oh, my baby is 6!

Chrisalynn - the Anointed Beauty

The Lord fills the home with rare and beautiful treasures.
(Proverbs 24:3)

It has been a long silence from blogging. And break from a lot of things.

As I promised, I will have my say on my Heavenly Father...since Father's Day, I've been thinking...there's just simply beyond words...my Father who is yours too:) - He is...WOW...do I have enough words to express...if only we could understand a little more of his great love each day...Don Moen's song became my prayer and contemplation...

Think about His love, think about His goodness
Think about His grace that's brought us through
For as high as the heavens above
So great is the measure of our father's love
Great is the measure of our Father's love
So great is the measure of our Father's love

How could I forget His love
And how could I forget His mercies
He satisfies, He satisfies, He satisfies my desires

Think about His love, think about His goodness
Think about His grace that's brought us through
For as high as the heavens above
So great is the measure of our father's love
Great is the measure of our Father's love

Great is the measure
Great is the measure
Great is the measure
Great is the measure of our Father's love
Great is the measure of our Father's love

Can we ever measure his love?
You and I have been loved. Just give it a thought.

(Dad enjoying fish spa - a delightful moment. Find out in GEMS)

In honour of the man who lovingly provided for the family and raised us - my Daddy, the ever loving, kind and generous man! I LOVE YOU.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!

To my Father in Heaven, I also have my say...will keep for the next post :)

Presenting their dream..."The Enchanted Forest"...

The dance

Three short films by the kids were screened following the live showcase.
I love this project as it wasn't just another dance piece...children were given a chance to explore their various artistic skills in an inclusive environment; and definitely a character building block for my own girls as they learned to work with special needs and shelter home children.

Finally, he took his first steps this week!
Two days after he turned 1, he took one step - all by himself. That's it. Ah Ma has been commenting boy very slow la...girls seemed to have faster headstarts. Hmm, she was a little impatient. This week while she babysat Ashton while I went out, the lil' boy made her very happy. She witnessed his first steps. And announced to us when we got back. Then the cutie pie proudly showed me 7 steps and beamed with a big smile...then clapped his hands! Ooh...so cute...the sisters were so thrilled at this milestone.

And...as for me, fourth round mothering...I am still as excited as I watched my baby grow.

Birthday breakfast (choc chips with kiwi fruit pancake) from Chrisa & Nat & Mum

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to our gorgeous gal!!!

Every birthday is a reminder of God's precious gift of life in the family.

(Read Marvellously Made in Gems)

Ashton in touch with nature - the most natural and absolutely interesting learning experience.


The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who lived in it...
(Psalm 24:1)

Princess Nellie of Netherlands

Princess Aranea of Norway

Our royal food...
yummy Betty Crocker's mashed potato, Arthur's Organic Pasta & Cheese, Eggs with mixed veges...washed down with grape juice (or was it Ribena that we used? :)

Instead of Just Mom and Me Having Tea by Mary Murray (a book gift from Aunty Christina to Nat), we decided to adopt a similar idea but a grander feel...so we really dress up :)

Girls just wanna have fun - and we did! Wholesome fun in the Lord.

(Note of thanks to Christina for the book. Very simple but gives/sparks ideas and allow us to share our hearts. Also, for me to add in personal touch in writings for each of the girls. I know this is for Nat but she agreed to let us all discuss the book together. She's always so kind.)

In case you are looking for the Queen's pic...erm...she was also the camera woman :) but yes, she was grandiously dressed up too.

Now you don't! Umm.

Ashton is exploring new taste and texture in food. Been grabbing food from our platters and refusing his own!

Everyday Chrisa bounces off endless mental output from her little mind...which isn't actually little at all since she amazes us with an assortment of mind-boggling input as well as many which require intelligent responses. They all come in various forms - questions, riddles, silly songs, funny rhymes, witty remarks and etc. Not to mention some serious theological questions.

I can't get this one out of my mind since yesterday...
If anyone can give her a satisfying answer, I will give you a good treat the next time I see you...

Q: Why do people say, " You get on my nerve...and not...you get on my brain or vein??"

Thought I wanted for a change to bake my own baby's birthday cake instead of grabbing one from the bakery which is stuffed with sugar!!! And they don't eat it anyway since I don't want my babies to have sweet tooth. The past three kids have nice purchased cakes. This time I wanted to be adventurous in the kitchen though baking is not particularly my cup of tea. My little helpers having picked up some good nutritional values, were always keeping watch for me in regards to their little brother's diet. So I can't "cheat" this time even if its his birthday cake. So I browsed through some baby cakes' recipes.

Result: I decided on a simple sugarless banana cake. Since I had spreadable ricotta cheese, I used that as my topping instead of whipping up my own frosting. That's easy. Chrisa sprinkled some choco & coloured rice to create the alphabet "A" for Ashton. Tadaa! We were so proud of ourselves.




For the first time, I had to apologize to the family for the healthy treat since I didn't think anyone expected a sugarless cake :) Guess it must be a good choice for the grannies too and caught those who have sweet tooth in surprise...haha...

The funny thing was the birthday boy never rejects any food I offered him...and for this, he just wouldn't open his mouth even to taste! After all the effort...

It was as though he just knew the trick when he was supposed to have a treat!!

Throughout the years of growing up, I've thought of Mother's Day as an important day to especially honour my mummy. As simple as she may be, I would not be here today without her. That's for sure. Her deep love touched me in ways unspeakable. She has her shortcomings but her sacrificial love overshadows all her flaws.

All of us have to come into this world through the womb of our mums. In this chaotic world, there are many abandoned children. I don't want to take for granted what mum had and still is doing for me even now I am a mother myself. How true it is that one will appreciate her mum even more when she becomes one too :) Nothing beats life's experience itself. Here I am in my own journey of motherhood - loving, living and definitely still learning. Despite my own limitations, I know my children still love me lots. What a privilige to stand on both sides to experience to be a mother and being mothered.

To all the lovely mothers...it is said MOM spelled upside down is WOW!
Happy Mother's Day! May God grant you his portion to continue to nurture.

Of all places, I landed up in the children's hospital yesterday. Ashton was admitted. His throat ulcers bothered him to the extent no food/drinks could be consumed. Drip was the last resort to keep him hydrated. As much as I dreaded this measure, I know he needed it after seeing him in much distress.

God has his way of turning every circumstance for the good of his children. Ashton got the rest he needed in the quiet room and my anxiety of his poor input/output taken care of with the drip. The much needed break I cried for the past weeks was being fulfilled in this place :) As I watched my baby settled calmly, my heart was eased into a peaceful state. The rest of the evening and night was my time alone with God. Such tangible gentle presence of God rested on me as I enjoyed this holy moment.

In every human heart only God can fill the void. I am surrounded by love - loving man, loving kids, loving extended family, loving friends yet there's a certain space within which only He can fill and fill it totally.

Been surrounded by children 24/7...ahem, what happens?


I am not sure about other mums, but I look forward to bedtime where I tuck them in after a long hard day, kissed them goodnight after prayers...watched them slip into dreamland and savour the moments of looking at their sweet faces as they lie in bed. Oh, not to mention the quietness of the atmosphere after noise pollution the entire day.

Tonight as with many nights, getting through the night routine itself is a great effort. Cleaning and changing, bedtime stories, bible reading and prayers...before I get to sit down to enjoy some quiet moments to keep my sanity. Many times I slipped into dreamland with them too:)

My plan didn't work out tonight and threw me off balance for a moment. I was desperate for help and quickly shot a prayer to God. Little did I know He was going to turn my tears into triumph. The night ended with a sweet note...

spent some moments alone with each child...

an hour plus with one who needed to talk more...PTL!!!

You've been hearing the feminine voice most of the time.
Finally the man with few words makes his mark here.

So for an added flavor of the masculine expression from our home, find updates in Edward's new website.

The growing eaglets in edlina's nest - learning, loving and living.

Every outing for us (especially if I go out alone with my children)never fails to attract attention. Some friendly smiles while others were strange stares...and still others led to interesting conversations and friendships.

Yesterday, I caught an elderly man smiled at me after I almost finished paying at the cashier of a bookshop. In a few moments, I saw the same man smiling at me again in the midst of the busy crowd of the mall. He pointed at my children and counted with his finger one by one, "1,2,3,4"...and then he gave a thumbs up! I smiled back. Ashlynn asked, "Do you know him, mum?" Obviously, I don't. He was one of those whom was delighted to see our little troop. It is not an uncommon gesture. I've got countless queries.

"Are these all yours?" (of, course, or else?)
"How many kids do you have?" (I am wondering if there's really that many to count)
"Huh? You got four!" (So?)
"Wah, so many kids!" (So many???)
"All girls? Oh, one boy."
"You are so little yourself...and you've got so many kids."

So many?! I thought I could still count them with one hand :)
Four - it's already SO MANY in our culture and generation. And to think God commanded us to "be fruitful and multiply". Thinking of the traditional (yet biblical) wishes to be productive when one get married and how genuine that wish is...hmm...I am pretty sure people don't think hard enough nor serious enough the extent of that wish. I've only a handful of well-wishers who really think this is a good and God-idea to be "fruitful and multiply". Should I highlight multiply? Ed says, in order to do that...the least is 4! When one couple has 2 (which is the urban norm), it is only replacement. Not reproduction.

So we are only hitting the minimum quotient.
I am subscribed to a Christian motherhood magazine which is a pro-natural parenting group. I admire their great faith of bringing up a big family of godly children. And I mean BIG. Not 4...but 8, 10, 20...and one particular case I read had 25!! Insane, right? How do you get such a massive number? Biological offsprings plus adoption. Four is certainly a small sum for these families :) Talking of touching lives...surely they have touched them under one roof.

The hand phone beeped again early this morning...a sms came in informing me of my friend's passing away. No matter how prepared I was, I still felt the pain surged in me. What more for his beloved wife and dear parents whom he left behind!

Death doesn't recognize age, gender, race, religion, nor status in life. The fear of the unknown never cease to confront the candidate; and the pain of the loss of their loved ones is tangible.
But, for those who believed in Him, we are convinced that neither death not life, neither angels nor demons, neither present not the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38-39)

I rest assured my friend is now in the glorious place; having completed his assignment on earth is now resting in peace. For all of us still present on earth, we still have our assignment to complete. And, the One who entrusted us the divine appointment will take to completion what he has begun in us. Let us make our lives count for eternity.

Early this morning, my hand phone rang...
No, it wasn't my alarm.
I saw the name...I knew in my heart it was probably bad news.
A friend called...informed me of our mutual friend's ill condition.
My heart sank though I had anticipated this day will arrive.
I had planned to visit him soon but haven't managed to...
We hadn't been in touch for years. He was based overseas. Just married 2 years' ago. Diagnosed with brain tumour. The malignancy spreads. Came back recently to his hometown. Wheeled chair bound. Poor physical condition with a grim outlook.
Last night, deteriorated further. Admitted to ICU, comatose.

Ed just rushed off with the friend who called to pray for him.
I am seated here with a heavy heart filled with emotional pain for his dear wife and parents. The last image of his face with a sleek smile when we last communicated flashed in my mind.
My prayers go forth for him and his family.

Life...
who can explain it all?

I used to confront this issue of life and death everyday working in the hospital.
The intensity heightened during my posting in ICU.
Death confronted my patients. The pain of the loss was excruciating to their loved ones.
The urgency of the gospel of truth was intensified in me. I went to work every shift armed with a mission and compassion for the lost.

The intensity of that urgency can sometimes tapples off when the norm of life takes over...
We all know life is full of uncertainties.
Yet death is a certain route - for "even when I walk through the valley of the shadow of death..." but the Good Shepherd is our comfort - "I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." (Psalm 23:4)

The certainty of death confronts all of us.
But each of us have a choice in our destiny.
My comfort for my friend lying in the ICU bed now is he knows Christ. He reconciled with his Creator. Heaven is welcoming him home.

Life is fragile. That's why we are asked to "watch and pray".
Today I heard my wake up call from heaven.

After being the 4th time mum, I know full well babyhood doesn't last. The complete helplessness of an infant will soon pass so quickly and I'll look back every time and marveled at how the once upon a time baby has grown so much in every way. I've learnt not to complain so much but to appreciate the brief period of growth spurt. In the short one year, the tiny helpless newborn is nurtured through basic needs of just simple diet and play and lots of sleep. And of course, loving touch and cuddles.

I watched my own babies grew. Now Ashton will be 9 months' old soon and I can't keep up with how the days just passed by...from the sealed eyes at the first two days in the hospital nursery, now that same pair of eyes twinkle with such delight and excitement each day. The once immobile infant is now crawling and exploring new ground daily. He is determine to stand without support but fell many times; only to get up and got over his fear and tears almost immediately. He is ready to explore again. Potentials and possibilities are ahead of him.

His birth keeps my eyes open to my spiritual baby too...Gateway City Church was conceived at the same time. The church celebrated her 1st anniversary last week. There's a lot of hard work in nurturing a new church plant. But just like my biological baby, I watched in great anticipation the potentials and possibilities ahead as our Loving and Gracious Father set his basic foundations, supply, support and shield His spiritual infant. It will come a time to soar.

Ooh la la.....enjoying juicy strawberries from Uncle Raju's.

Recapturing some busy, but fun moments of Dec 2008.....

The last quarter of 2008.....Ash and Nat passed an audition for a dance project by Anak-Anak Kota (under the Ombak-Ombak Art Studio). They diligently undergone 6 hours of training in the weekends under the abled dance teacher, Aida Redza. More intensive training during the school holidays.

The girls really enjoyed themselves thoroughly working on their creative pieces and exploring contemporary dance in different ways. Not to mention making new friends who share the same passion and interesting way of discovering the history of the city.

I was so tired yesterday and Ashton clung on to me. I made many promises to my girls but was simply impossible to get pass the bed with Ashton. The craft work and reading which I was supposed to do with them...oh well, they did all by themselves.

I pulled myself out of bed feeling lethargic and thought, "Oh dear, I've got to get dinner going." To my surprise, I caught my girls in action - in the kitchen! They shooed me off and commanded me to stay off. Dinner would be served soon. They busied themselves as I sat in the living room waiting with my tummy growling in hunger. But it was a sweet feeling coming all over me. Instead of serving them, I would be served :)

There was a bit of squabbling in the kitchen but everything was in control. Soon they proudly set the table and served pasta, mushroom soup and vegetable salad; and apples glazed with honey. And noodles for me since we were short of pasta! Ashlynn exclaimed as we sat down, "Mum, we can survive without you" with a positive note in her voice as this means I can go off for a break and leave them home alone. She was reinforcing to me AGAIN..."not to worry!"

I looked at them and thought, "Wow, they are really growing up!"

One of the fun things we do in our family...guess who this is?

I've been enjoying writing the gems' devotional. Every time I put those thoughts down, I am ministered by God myself. Though life always has neverending challenges, my heart can't deny there's a Supreme Being in control. I wish I can write more often but I guess for now once a week is good enough. Give me ample time to savour my own thoughts and allow one scripture or two to really invade my inner self and speak loud and clear. It's wonderful too to see how my own girls are benefiting from a simple write-up. Probably these are very personal accounts so they can identify full well. Hence, the scriptures become alive to them even at this tender age.

What had springboard from this simple act of obedience is the Lynns decided to use these gems for our weekly mother-daughters' bible study. There's so much to talk about and I really enjoy such moments. Simply priceless. Inspiration sparked off as we discussed some questions pertaining to the topic. Check out Ashlynn's Discoveries for one creative result. Perhaps I should formulate some questions to be included in the blog too for those who wish to reflect deeper.

For those who have been visiting Gems, THANK YOU for taking time to read and be patient with me as I continue to work on improving as time permits. Let us not give up encouraging each other...as Hebrews 10:24-25 command.

A new year begins.....there are many things I need to do, and want to do. Amongst the many things, I have an offering to bring to God.....

Announcing my new blog http://gemsfortheheart.blogspot.com ; a devotional write-up which I aim to do weekly at this moment with the ultimate goal of daily articles.

Lovingly dedicated to my gorgeous daughters, Ashlynn and Nathalynn and many special women in my life; and all of you who have been faithfully dropping by our blog. It is my desire and prayer you will pick up a gem or two from heaven as you take time to read.

Be blessed!

It's almost 4 am and I should be sleeping soundly. Instead I am feeling more alert now than few hours earlier. We just crossed over to a brand new year. The church family in Gateway City Church had the very first watchnight service. I would say this is the best for me. Simply it is a much smaller setting and naturally warmer. Plus to beat the norm we presented creative offerings to the Lord.

As we reflected on the year gone by.....we testified God's goodness and faithfulness through songs, dance, media presentations. Some gave the classic oral testimonies. Others rendered their offerings through the splendid spread of supper! It warmed my heart to see each one's creativity and the simplicity of bringing before the Beloved Father our humble offerings. I am sure it put a smile on His face knowing that they flowed from His children's eager hearts.

Pr. Ed preached a mountain-moving message. To have bold faith and enter a new year with great belief and courage in asking God. What a hopeful new year! It is a year of Possibilities!