edlina & the lynns
I know God will not give me anything I can't handle,
I just wish that he didn't trust me so much.
-Mother Theresa
I've been stepping on the accelerator of my life for the past two months since Ashton's birth (woah, ya...he's already 2 months' old and put on 2 kg). I hit the climax the past week with Ed's absence - having to hold the fort for home and church. Running on high speed and trying to beat the clock - continuosly from one task to another. I wonder how Susannah Wesley did it in her time!
Tending to unending physical needs of an infant, answering endless questions of a curious barely 5 year-old, and meeting the emotional needs of two preteens...grappling with my own insecurity of 'have I done enough?' for homeschooling...and to top it all up in a tall glass to drink - to preach on Sunday...I survived and thankfully didn't get choked!
I know it full well God's grace is sufficient but I am only human to echo the quote above. I wish there is less to do for now. However after catching my breath today (got some moments to regain my sanity), I know God never make mistake. Whatever He entrusts in my hands, I pray He'll establish each of them for His purpose. As for me, there is no higher calling, no greater honour than to be at service for my Lord and King. I praise and thank God for work!
edlina & the lynns
The room door was closed when I walked past my daughters' room one morning. It's usual morning routine of breakfast, devotion, house chores and school work. Some times, the girls need some reminders to speed up so we can all finish what need to be done the first part of the day. With baby Ashton around, I left the girls to be independent and responsible for many tasks.
Being a task-oriented person, I opened the door and was about to question Nat on dawdling when I spotted her holding her devotional book. On her door hung a sign which read,
"In the progress of creative dreaming....."I smiled at her, closed the door and thought a little about that phrase.
Perhaps it is in such moments big dreams and visions are birthed, creative ideas flow, and masterpieces produced. This is the essence of homeschooling which I thank God for - the opportunity to allow creativity and not having to rush through when the school bell goes.
Just quite recently, I read that
we must learn to waste time with God.Time with God - ever wasted?
edlina & the lynns
Life is a battle. Different people fight for different things in life. These few days there's been quite a bit of sibling rivalry at home. I was trying very hard to be as fair in my judgement and treatment as possible to avoid the problem or at least not to contribute to the cause. However, no matter how hard I tried, I wasn't spared this common parenting challenge. It is one tiring feat.
The girls were fighting for the least important things (at least in my opinion). Though they reconciled quickly every time it happened, it still bothered me as a mum. We were driving home and I began sharing some thoughts from a recent Mandarin movie I watched - Three Kingdoms.
It is not such a spectacular show but I was reminded again of my Christian journey - it is a battlefield warred with courage and determination. Zao Zilong (Andy Lau) though wounded declared to his comrades that he will not remove his armour when he is in a battle. He threw his buddy a crucial question, "What are we fighting for?" His buddy's response, "I don't know about you. I am fighting for myself." His buddy betrayed Zilong because his vision was to carve a name for himself. Zilong's cause was to unite the nation. He died with dignity and honour for the cause he fought for.
That is so true for the Christian walk. We cannot and must not remove our
armour - Ephesians 6:11 commands us to 'put on the full armour of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes.' The whole passage gives details of that armour and with that we stand our ground; and declare our faith fearlessly.
With that I asked my girls how will they channel their energy, what is worth fighting for in life? The challenge lingers in my own mind..."What am I fighting for?"
edlina & the lynns
My baby brother is so cute, so wonderful, and so great.
He's to be a great warrior of God as he grows.
I know it very well.
It seems a little funny.
Only one boy in the house.
With three girls in the family just
seems so odd
around.
The size of him is like my doll.
From far away he is really small.
But anyway we're a family.
So what's the matter?
Just let it be.
Horton says, "A persons a person no matter how small".
-Nat-
edlina & the lynns
Being a fourth time mum, I kind of expected what entails in a labour process...just that I have no say in the timing of baby's arrival. I never reach - not anything near to my expected date of deliveries. All my girls came really early with one premature baby of 29 weeks. Even though I quite expected this fourth offspring will also be early but on one hand prayed that he will be carried to term.
Gateway City Church first church camp ended with my session on "
fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross". I stood there heavily pregnant preaching what God had laid in my spirit. As I urged the church to look ahead at Jesus our focal point, I was also reminded no matter how difficult and heavy I felt with my small frame supporting a growing baby at 33 weeks plus in gestation, my comfort was to endure for the sake of the joy set before me. Soon...yes, soon I will be holding my baby tangibly in my hands. Interestingly during the night before, I dreamt I had given birth but awaken at night only to rub on my existing protruded abdomen realizing it was just a dream. Somehow dreams have been significant in many of my life's stories. Deep down my heart I knew he was coming.
Indeed it was fast. The night I returned from camp, I went into labour. I was so ready to deliver, but my doctor wasn't, being a preterm case again! I was transfered to another bigger hospital just in case baby require neonatal ICU care. All necessary treatment were administered. I was left completely contraction free the entire day time and lying down in the labour room talking to God and claiming His promises. I had read earlier in Isaiah 66:7-8 which declares:
"Before she goes into labour, she gives birth; before the pains come upon her,
she delivers a son.
Who has ever heard of such a thing?
Who has ever seen such things?"No. Never, unless one uses medical intervention. Though I knew I cannot escape labour pain yet this portion of scriptures was very comforting and I boldly asked God for his miraculous intervention. I confessed the Word throughout and hold it dearly in my heart. God had walked me through every childbirth; and each has its own story of his faithfulness. The nurses always marvelled at my childbirth processes - fast and easy. They would tell me I should have more babies! And I laid in the labour room wondering what would be the story this time?!
Since my nursing days, I've watched patients using epidural. However, in the recent years this medical technology has caught up significantly with many educated women requesting it in order to be pain-free. Never did it crossed my mind to ever ask for it all these years. Had always thought the labour process is part of the beauty of motherhood. For some reason, as I await this round, I was wondering if I should try epidural this time to compare and perhaps come to a conclusion of certain thoughts of the debate of the usage of epidural. My smart husband smiled at me and threw back the question to me, "If you've asked God for a miracle, why do you need epidural?" Afterall, I never used in the past 3 times. Hmm, I was left with abandoning myself in my Father's Hands again. Surely he will take me through it once again. I empathized with the women in the next rooms. I could only whispered prayers for them as they groaned and cried in labour...and then rejoiced with them silently when I heard the cries of every newborn.
The night came and I began experiencing some mild contraction. It was getting more frequent and I knew the labour couldn't be prolong till the next day anymore. I informed the nurse and she checked on me regularly and commented perhaps my threshold of pain is high as my response had always been "bearable". But I believe it was my Father's Hands holding me. I was in full control of my situation, composed and washed by God's peace. Then...the much awaited moment...the bearing down sensation came upon me but unbelievably mild compared to all my past experiences! I told the nurse "baby's coming"...the obstetrician and Ed arrived shortly. Withing less than 15min, a son was born unto us...and he shall be called, Ashton - the strong fortress or settlement, the supplicant; "I cry out to God Most High, to God who will fulfil his purpose for me" (Psalm 57:2 NLT).
The Lord released his word in Isaiah 66:7-8. I watched the word come to pass. Although not completely without pain but significantly less in intensity. Tremendously less that I could still talk and discuss with the nurse during the bearing down sensation (which I remember were the worst part of labour for me in the past 3). Indeed a miracle. Who needs epidural when carried in our Father's Hands? And preterm Ashton is doing great at 2.4kg and ruled out the need of respirator and incubator. All because we were in His Hands.
edlina & the lynns
The Lynns has been looking forward eagerly to the movie, "Prince Caspian" after their craze over "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe". We are into the last 3 chapters of this classic literature and getting ready to enjoy the visual effects and seeing the unfolding of the book at the big screen; then plunging into an adventurous unit study on it. Every night, they will excitedly sit around mum for this bedtime reading and tapping over my tummy to talk to
sayang. Yep,
sayang had no choice but to 'join in listening'.
Every time we passed by the billboard of Prince Caspian...Chrisa never fails to remind us of the classic hitting the cinema in town on May 16. However, another prince decided to race in first taking over Prince Caspian as he has been quietly listening all this while.....he arrived 6 weeks earlier than expected on May 6!
Announcing the early arrival of Prince Ashton
(Lynns
' sayang)!
You think Prince Caspian is cool? Here's one cool pic of Prince Ashton with his "first sunglass" - sunbathing under the phototherapy :)
"Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of the warrior are sons born in one's youth." - Psalm 127:3-4
.jpg)
