I pulled the blanket over my cold body. Ashton pulled it off a little and whispered with loving eyes, "Mum, let's go eat breakfast." I couldn't resist his affectionate smile. "OK," I said. Before I got out of bed, he scrambled back onto the bed with two books in his hands. "Read to me, mum." As much as I wanted to start my morning routine (if there's any success everyday to have a routine), I couldn't bring myself to decline such a polite request. Here's how it went the moment I hit the morning...there's no stopping...one thing to another...

We read...
We prayed...

We ate breakfast...
We read some more...
We cooked. Chrisa stirred the soup and learned how much salt and seasoning to add while Ashton insisted to learn too...
We read again...this time all the children, all four surrounded mama for a long forgotten story, The Donkey Prince, a welcoming warm story of loving the person just they way they are...
We discussed on homosexuality...oh, what a big word for small people...
We ate again...
The children baked bread for dinner...three out of the four cramming over the kitchen counter to get the measurement right...some practical math in process...mama only hoped it turn out alright...
They all got busy with their work in their own corners...one learned Tagalog for the coming trip to Manila and collecting ideas for children's work there; one browsing through the Prayer Guidepost to learn how to pray more effectively and moaning in discomfort mostly of her unwellness; one was reading endlessly on the couch then played with the little one; and the little one...he was never done with exploring one thing after another...the entire living room was in (and still is) a creative mess...yes, it's messy because there is never lack of projects going on in the home, and creative, oh yes, certainly...one working on a board game of her own, one making his pictures, all travel logs reviewed and added...
They washed toys while I washed clothes...
We read, we wrote, we talked, we laughed...in between there were some bickering which mama hates, and the children know it...correcting behaviour is never easy and needs consistency...
Three stayed home to watch a show...

One went with mama to shop for utilities, our chance to talk...

We rode to the park, we played our hearts out...

We enjoyed the freshly baked bread...
We read the Bible, we talked, we prayed...we almost ended our day...they jumped on mama, kissed her goodnight, hugged her tight...I turned off the light...
Shh..."sleep, babies..."
Is mama's time with the Father now...I sat by the dim light and thanked God for the full day...a gift from heaven...
My day had been full...indeed my hands too, but it is all worth it because my heart is full too...as I reflect and realized that I've been kissed countless times, hugged very often, told "I love you, mama"...and I know this is my vocation...

What about "school"...hmm, do they need to be classify into subjects? We have no time to study. Everyday is so busy...we are busy learning, busy living, busy loving...and...
That's LIFE!

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. (John 10:10, ESV)

 

I wonder...I don't know how...I don't even know "what we ought to pray" (Romans 8:26). But the words of the apostle Paul assures me that I can be absolutely sure of one thing, which is..."that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

When I am left wondering in uncertainty and in the heat of of a fiery furnace, I know I can rest in the knowledge that God is good and He is great!

She was just a simple girl.
She loves to draw.

She loves to dance.
She loves to teach.
She wants to do her part in loving humankind.
She dreamed of marrying a good man,
raise their young - children of destiny.
She wants to continue loving the family she grows up in.
She dreams of a quiet simple life.

Along the journey, she met Jesus.

He changed the way she sees life, the way she loves, the way she thinks.
He sees a bigger potential in her.
Now he calls her, "mother of the city",
then he expands her heart for the nations.
She is humbled by his majesty,
empowered by his strength;
but deep inside her...
her quest remains the same - simplicity.
She can only do all these and remain simple when she
"seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given..."

That girl is me. To stay true to myself and my quest in life, I can only look to Jesus as he calls me, ²⁸ “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹ Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰ For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

Rest comes in many forms. For a busy stay home mum surrounded by endless noises of children, a quiet personal space is a luxury. I cannot have all my ideals. But God knows and takes care of all our needs. I am counting my blessings for every small and big gift coming my way.

All the excitement of coming to Singapore - it's here! We are here - in the Lion City. I am so excited for Ash and Nat. Their very first RAD Ballet Summer Camp. Being in a foreign land and flapping their new wings - they took off this morning by themselves to the ballet studio for their third day of camp. All geared up for more dance work on Mary Poppins. Sounds so fun! Their legs are surely strengthened by all the dancing and walking around the city.

The past days had been full days exploring different parts of the city and familiarizing with the routes. Pretty much of an adventure! Indeed a very convenient city. Impressed with the efficiency despite many visits here. The call is deepened every time I think of my own nation. We are called to make a difference and be agent of change. No matter how comfortable and convenient another place is - my call is to be part of the wave of transformation back home.

Thank Lord for opening my eyes - the eyes of my heart to the smallest thing that speaks volume of our generation and nation. I am positioned strategically for such a time like this. Here I am resting in his love. Here I stand for his higher purpose...

Every year on this day, brings me back to my humble beginning as a mum.

Cuddling this tiny 2.3 kg load offered a lifetime of responsibility. I remember beaming with such joy yet so overwhelmed by the tremendous task set ahead of me. The scene of me sitting at the bedside of the maternity home holding this precious life still stays fresh. It was my enrolment into the School of Motherhood - one specialized school so uniquely tailored for every student, offers no certification nor graduation, but guarantees a huge load of work which requires diligence, patience, consistency and love - yes, lots of love! Many hours of sleepless nights, days of toil...AND I gladly willingly stepped into this school. After thirteen years, The Principal Teacher gave me added assignments - he added three more tiny loads, all not more than 2.5 kg as a start but power-packed with promising potentials to be yielded for his glory.

Today I watched my first tiny 2.3kg load transformed into a much bigger size than me, could even lift me up in the air, adorned in her all new attire from top to toe (gifts blessed by wonderful people) got ready for the day. She kissed me and went off with a smile, all ready for the youth conference for the next 3 days.

She is thirteen today! She is clothed with strength and beauty. Her name is Ashlynn.
She is a terrific, tremendous teen. I am proud to call her 'my daughter'.

HAPPY 13th BIRTHDAY, DEAREST ASH!

I hardly could sit in one position. I struggled to find the right angle to sit and sleep. I could hardly breathe properly. Every breath was an effort. The baby was growing. He was pressing down to my pelvic bone. The pain increased with the days. The intense discomfort made my fourth time mummy experience unbearable. But I endured. I would persist till the baby come in full term. He was God's handiwork woven in the fabric of my womb.

We could not stay still any longer. We were challenged to reposition. Repositioning required action. It demanded drastic and radical move. Joshua and the Israelites were commanded to "move out of their position and follow the presence of God." Then only they would know the direction clearly. The book of Joshua is a dangerous book to read. It is filled with intense passion, propelled by faith to release the power to achieve the impossibles. A seed has been planted in our spirit and had been brewing in the secret place for years. The time had come. We embraced it with strength and courage to protect the conception of this spiritual seed. There were shaking off old mindsets to fully understand the seriousness and intensity of God's call and commands. We were stripped bare of our comfort zone to cross over to the unknown. Then only would we see the power of God parting our "Jordan River". Indeed he did.

The physical babe we conceived, Ashton - strong fortress and the spiritual baby, Gateway City Church were God's favour and honour. He weaved both in our physical and spiritual womb at a significant time to amplify the seeds of his faithfulness, love, strength and power. These two are strong reminders of who our God is, and what he can do - he majors in impossibilities! The joy of at the end of the labour pain was guaranteed. My role was to PUSH - till I hear the triumphant cry! The cry of release of the impregnated seeds. To God be the glory!

Today Ashton turns 3. He is a visual reminder of GCC's milestone.

The saga continues...